An Average Day

One of my favorite targets is stupid middle aged women in shitty cheap small engined cars. I had a slight bump this morning. We were tooling up the hill and there was a said brainless (she turned out to be a teacher - ive worked in and around teachers, the ones that work in primary schools know fuck all about anything, thats why kids get to 18 years of age and go to College with a vocabulary of about 35 words and the spelling skills of a retarded chimpanzee) woman in front in some contempable red pile of crapwith a 1200 cc engine, enough to power a packet of fags and thats all.

Anyhoo, we played 'brake stamping' halfway up a hill (because some other retard in a lorry hadn't worked out that trying to move 42 tonnes of rock 300 yards up a 1 in 6 hill requires more power than he has, and managed to stop at the top) , and i wasn't quick enough, and JUST caught her bumper with my headlamp. It broke my headlamp glass, side lamp glass and cracked the plastic bumper up (a bit more...). She stopped, just on the bend. Two hundred cars, lorries and vans immediately have to take avoiding action to get round us without taking my rear corner off.

I told her to move it further up, since I didnt want to die discussing the main snags of driving a car that cost less than a packet of crisps new and built with the production values of a bankrupt African banana republic.

The tard moved her heap of shit further up, where it was a bit safer, and we got out to inspect. I'd taken the most damage, all she had was a small 1/2 inch (yes, 1/2 inch, fuck metrication - if you dont know what an inch is then go buy a proper rule with inches on) scratch on the rear bumper

'You've WRECKED my car' she screeched, in that way that women who dont know the oil filler from the water filler screech.

Now , all it had on it was a small 1/2 inch scratch on the rear bumper. It was in fact a two year old Fiat Punto, but the thing was so dirty it would have passed for a stock car.

I couldn't be arsed to argue with her. Teachers are on of those groups of people who all have high IQ's and practically no common sense.

Couldn't be arsed to work more than four hours today after that, so I went home at two o'clock. There a Polish bird in the marketing dept who has a lovely spankable bum



and an unpronounceable name, shes about 24. I hung around watching her wobble round the room for about 40 mins, then went home to put on some nice black rubber gear.